Tonight I learned a very important lesson (yet again). Sometimes if you really want something you need to open your mouth and blow your own horn. It dont guarantee that you will get it but not standing up and reminding folks about who you are and telling them why you want something will guarantee that you dont get it.

If you are a regular reader of this blog then you already know that I am an extremely outspoken and politically motivated writer, what you may not know is that I hate speaking in front of people. Mark it up to inate insecurity, mark it up to basically being a shy person, I dont for sure why but the fact is that I dislike talking about myself in front of other people.

So I am sitting here tonight, more than just a bit bummed because I did not get something I have desired for a long time. I might not have gotten it even if I had been able to do something besides mutter like a teenage boy asking for his first date, but instead of knowing that for a fact. I am sitting here thinking I didn't get it because I didn't TRY hard enough.

IDIOT

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